The day you become a dad is a seismic shift—suddenly, your entire world revolves around a tiny, squirmy little person who doesn’t come with an instruction manual. And if you’re lucky enough to have paternity leave, you’ve got something dads a generation ago could only dream of: time.
But let’s be real—time off with a newborn is not a vacation. It’s a mash-up of sleepless nights, diaper blowouts, and googling “why is my baby crying?” at 3 a.m. Still, paternity leave can be one of the most important and rewarding times in your life, if you make the most of it.
Side note: We know that not all employers offer this and that it is still a growing benefit. If you
The Paternity Leave Boom
Taking time off for a new baby isn’t just for moms anymore. As companies expand parental leave policies and stigma slowly fades, more American fathers are taking paternity leave than ever before. In 2023, 32% of fathers reported getting paid paternity leave—up 5 percentage points from the year before. This trend matters because studies consistently show that when dads take leave, they build stronger bonds with their kids and are more involved in parenting long-term.
There’s also evidence that partners benefit, too. When dads are fully present during those early weeks, it’s a game-changer for shared parenting down the road. Moms feel more supported, which can lower rates of postpartum depression and help establish healthier dynamics from the start.
Related Article: Postpartum Depression in Fathers
What Experts Say
Organizations like the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommend paternity leave when possible, highlighting that dads who take time off tend to be more engaged as their children grow. Research shows that bonding during those first few weeks can influence how involved a dad will be for years to come.
But despite the benefits, a lot of guys are still hesitant to take full advantage of their leave. Whether it’s fear of career setbacks or just not knowing how to spend the time, it’s easy to feel unsure about what to do.
Tips for Making the Most of Paternity Leave
- Be All In: Turn off work notifications. You won’t get this time back, so be present. Even if your leave is only a week or two, commit to soaking it all in.
- Divide and Conquer: Teamwork with your partner isn’t just about chores. It’s about learning to read each other’s stress signals and figuring out a rhythm that works for everyone.
- Create Your Own Bonding Rituals: Skin-to-skin contact, feeding (even if it’s just giving a bottle of pumped milk), or just wearing your baby in a carrier while you make breakfast—these small moments build strong connections.
- Learn and Adjust: It’s okay not to have it all figured out. Babies change fast, and so will your approach. Allow yourself some grace.
- Find Your Dad Community: Whether it’s through social media, local meet-ups, or just a text thread with other dads, having a support network makes a huge difference.
- Stay Flexible: Plans are great, but newborns have their own schedules. Be patient with yourself and your family as you navigate the chaos.
Related Article: Dads & Bottle Feeding
Understanding Reality
We also understand that not every dad has the luxury of paid paternity leave. The truth is, while more companies are expanding their policies, the majority of American fathers still don’t have access to paid leave. Many new dads are faced with tough choices—taking unpaid time off, using vacation days, or simply pushing through and returning to work right away. It’s not always fair, and it’s not always easy. If you’re in that boat, know that you’re not alone and that doing your best with what you have is more than enough.
The Takeaway
Paternity leave can be one of the most fulfilling, life-changing experiences you’ll ever have. It’s not about being perfect—it’s about being there. And the more time you spend with your baby now, the more likely you are to be actively involved as they grow. If you have the option to take leave, take it. If you feel like you’re floundering, join the club. Every new dad feels lost at some point. It’s part of the process.
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Sources
- “Fathers Taking Paternity Leave,” from Pew Research Center. Published on February 20, 2024.
- “The Benefits of Paternity Leave,” from American Academy of Pediatrics. Published on March 1, 2024.
- “Paid Family Leave in the U.S.,” from U.S. Department of Labor. Pulled from the internet on April 2, 2025.
